POLITICS
Republicans just blather and blather.
While Democrats just get in a lather,
Though the rest of us,
We never much fuss,
Still hoping common sense they could gather
John Boehner is certainly not crazy,
Even if you think his man tan may be.
Nonetheless his crying,
Is quite stupefying,
And, puts to shame all other cry babies.
Limbaugh says Health Care is just fine as is,
And needs no new laws, taxes or patches,
“What’s a few million uninsured?”
“Hell, they can be faith cured,”
“And save money by dying in batches!”
Conservative, WASP, evangelical or Anglican
Republicans can be so downright unAmerican,
“To Hell with all the rest,
Let’s feather our own nest!”
Could be the the epithet of the last Republican.
Republicans say their tent is big and inclusive,
Declaring they wish not to be reclusive,
Yet tolerate no homos nor lesbians,
No Atheists, Progressives nor Haitians,
All those and Republicans are mutually exclusive!
"All those whiners!" declared Phil Gramm,
"We've got ours so we don't give a damn.
John 'n me and most of our friends,
Got more money than we can spend.
Let the poor eat cake and marmalade jam."
Too much education is a bad thing,”
Said Karl Rove of the Right Wing.
“It’s really quite pathetic,
Letting people vote Democratic,
Could well cut short a Republican swing.”
The Roadblock and Train Wreck party held a meeting,
“There’s absolutely no doubt we’re in for a beating.”
Said national Chairman Michael Steele,
“And, I must make a last ditch appeal,”
“To return to our core values of lying and cheating.”
An old Republican queer named Mitch,
Swore to run health care straight in the ditch,
Wearing a shirt of bright pink,
He minced as he winked,
“Screw health care, I’m still a stone bitch!”
A Democrat out driving a Toyota,
Ran over a Republican Voter.
‘Thank goodness!’ he cried,
“He was on the wrong side,”
“And I don’t blame myself one iota!”
Of the US Congress, who can say?
Why they plot, sellout, stall and delay?
All we absolutely know for sure,
Their results resemble horse manure,
With the public always the ones who pay.
ALASKANS
MILLEROSCOPY
Joe Miller ran for public office.
Alaska voters held a caucus.
Decided he was a nut case,
Wearing a thug’s beard on his face,
Who made everyone too nauseous.
Joe Miller went all wacky and nervous,
The election became a huge circus,
And, when the recount at last came in,
Poor ol’ Joe took it smack on the chin;
For, voters learned Joe Miller was worthless!
PALINOLOGY
Due to her total refudiation,
Of all the entire Obama nation,
Sarah Palin drew a bead,
Never mind the need,
On all health care laws and legislation.
WHAT'S THE MATTER WITH SARAH PALIN?
Whatever could be the matter with Sarah Palin?
Disturbing all with her sad weeping and wailing.
Insisting the media spawned her political derailing,
Whining by Facebook, Twittering, and secret emailing,
Insinuating so much with insufficient detailing,
Blaming all but herself for her career's curtailing,
Hopefully now her political coffin has its last nail in.
THE DANCER
There once was a dancer named Bristol;
Who was ever so ignorantly blissful.
Like her mom, a mental midget,
She extended her middle digit,
And used her finger as her pistol.
"THE DIM-WITTED TWEETER"
There was once a dim witted twit who twittered,
Who quitted her governor's job with all its glitter.
And, promised to never, ever leave Twitter.
But soon did so with nary a back-look nor titter.
Then, later behold! About-faced and unquitted Twitter!
Yes, this dim-witted twit recanted and re-twittered,
She twittered about this and that and the other,
Death panels, Russia and Obama's mother.
Hoping everyone forgot the job so blithely quittered.
On, she twittered, and twittered and twittered,
On subjects she hardly knew quit from quinolla,
She expounded on Levi, McCain, Trig and Angola.
On Sesame, governments, church and pipefitters.
She shamefully twittered and twittered and twittered,
While the country grew quite weary and so jittered,
All tired of her nonsense and now sadly embittered,
While the sheen on her star dimmed and quite flittered.
Nonetheless, she persistently, mindlessly twittered,
Ignoring all pleas, imprecations and screams,
Plugging always her twisted, evangelical dreams,
Even husband Todd too, wanted to jump up and hit her.
May we never see again all those perfidious twitters,
Playing so to fears, paranoia, religion and bitters,
Plainly, insanely, chasing her own lost fame and glitters,
Yes, next time give us at least a rational bullshitter!
THE QUITTER
Sarah Palin thinks everyone's out to get her,
Which makes her mad and so awfully bitter,
She's resorting to politically incorrect twitters.
The public is greatly amazed, and all in a titter,
Her constituents never agreed to permit her,
To abandon her state nor to submit her,
To ridicule, amazement and rude side-splitters,
Being a lipsticked mom from a pit bull's litter,
Didn't qualify Sarah nor make her one bit fitter,
To govern a state nor be a political outwitter.
Turns out, Sarah's only an inept, low-octane quitter!
Tweet!
Tweet!
Tweet!
