Grizzly Food

Two Grizzly bears on a national forest were hard up for food one year. After a too-cold Winter and a too-hot Spring, there was very little to eat. What there was was dried up and frizzled.

So, the older, more grizzled bear Sam, said to his younger companion Roger one day, “You know what? I’m so damned hungry I think I’m gonna eat me a tourist.”

“You can’t do that!” protested Roger. “Don’t you remember that warning Smokey gave us?”

“Yeah, yeah, I know. We’re not supposed to eat the tourists ‘cause if we do they’ll declare us ‘problem bears’ and hunt us down and shoot us like, well . . . . , bears. But, I’m a-telling you Roger, if we don’t start snacking on some  tourists pretty soon we’re gonna starve to death. Hell, that’s a worse way to die than getting shot.”

“Guess you’re right about that.” said Roger. “So, what do we do to catch us a tourist? I’ve never done that before.”

“Me neither, but it’s simple,” said Sam. “We just hide behind some rock beside a hiking trail and when we see a tourist coming by alone, why we just grab him and run off in the forest with him and fix him and eat him where no one will notice. Why don’t you go over and wait by the Upper Trail and I’ll take the Lower? We’ll meet again tonight to see how we did.”

“Roger that.” said Roger.

Later that evening when they met to compare notes Sam asked Roger, “So, how’d you do today?”

“Pretty good I guess.” Roger replied. “I caught me a Mexican. Holy Cow!  Was he all juicy and spicy! He tasted great once I got by that hot chili pepper zing. But, he was pretty buttery too so I’m worried about my cholesterol now. How’d you do?”

“Sheesh!” said Sam. “I’m gonna have to do better than I did today or I’m gonna starve completely to death anyway! I screwed up and caught me a Norwegian.”

“So, what’s wrong with Norwegians?” asked Roger.

“You don’t know? They’re mostly gnarly twisted gristle and not tasty at all, even on a good day. They eat too much fish and rotten cheese and downright stink inside.” said Sam disgustedly. “Everybody knows that. But, you can’t tell from the outside. My Norwegian must have eaten some of that awful, rotten Lutefisk too. Once I finally got all his stinky parts and bad pieces cleaned out, I ended up with only a couple handfuls of edible stuff. I tell you right now Roger, nobody can live on Norwegians! Let’s hope I can do better tomorrow.”

The next evening they met again. Sam said, “Well, I did a lot better today, thank goodness. I caught me one of those monks from over at the monastery. He was delicious, filling and fully satisfying.”

“Gosh Sam,” said Roger. “I caught me one of those monks too, but I could hardly eat the damned guy, tasted awful. I had to choke him down.”

“How’d you fix him?” asked Sam.

“Boiled him of course, like I always do.”

“Well, there’s your damned problem right there! Don’t you ever learn? Those kind of monks are friars!” laughed Sam as Roger hung his head.

They met again next evening. Roger was grinning and Sam was out of sorts.

“Man, this was the best day so far!” grinned Roger.

“I probably don’t even want to hear about it,” snarled Sam. “but, go ahead and tell me if you must.”

“Yeah, well, I really lucked up and caught me a Democrat.” chortled Roger. “Man, was he sweet and succulent. He hardly even hollered when I grabbed him. He was oozing with all this sweet syrupy stuff and smelled good too. I’m so full of sweet, environmentally friendly wholesome food I gotta take a nap. How’d you do yourself?

“Hell, wouldn’t you just believe the damned luck?” Sam snarled. “You go out and catch yourself a nice fat Democrat and all I got was this knotty, shitty, stinking damned Republican. Once I got all the shit cleaned out of him there was nothing left but his teeth, his gold cross and his wallet. He was ten times worse than a Norwegian! Damn! Do ya think maybe he coulda been a freaking Norwegian Republican?

“I tell ya what Roger, tomorrow me and you are gonna switch trails!”

The Tea Party Ship of State

I first saw the Tea Party Express down at the docks. I was drawn to that odd vessel by all those flags waving about overhead. That boat was a strange sight indeed. First, there was the hull itself which looked hurriedly cobbled together - and not very expertly either - seemingly out of discarded railroad boxcars, re-cycled army tanks, church steeples and a lot of other unidentifiable material. Lying at the dock, the boat seemed to list impossibly far to the right. In fact, the strange craft looked entirely hard aground and near capsizing.

There were all those flags and banners of course. First, there was a huge American flag flying from the masthead, which itself seemed to be made from an extra high church steeple. Flying from the crossbars of the cross on top were  other flags. One had ‘Don’t Tread on Me’ boldly written beneath the image of a rattlesnake on a yellow background. Another small one showed a tree with the words “It’s Time to Water the Tree of Liberty with Blood”. Still other smaller ones here and there had pictures of guns, and some had images and words which would guarantee a desperate life-or-death fight if unwisely waved in the Watts neighborhood of LA for example.

Still and all it was a colorful sight. I spotted an oddly dressed man striding importantly about on deck. He wore camouflage trousers and a shirt seemingly made out of the United States flag. On his head appeared to be some sort of floppy olive drab military campaign hat. A large, oval silver belt buckle with an American eagle set in gold was at his waist, and a large silver cross hung conspicuously from a chain around his neck. “I (heart) Sarah Palin and Glenn Beck” was tattooed on his right arm. Taking him for some sort of comic icon I asked if he knew where the captain might be found.

“I am the captain!” he informed me importantly. I introduced myself and said my newspaper sent me to write an article on the ship and that I’d like to interview him.

“Fire away.” he said. I had noticed that he seemed very militant and had sort of belligerent in-your-face attitude, so first, I asked him about his military experience.

“Unfortunately, to my great regret, I never had the opportunity to serve my country in the military.” he answered.

I asked why not since his apparent age seemed about right for the Vietnam years.

“Well at the time I was seeking a critical civilian occupation and felt my services were far more important to the war effort through that there here at home.” he replied, not looking me in the eye.

I wondered out loud what that critical civilian occupation might have been.

“Well, to be honest, I was between jobs but looking for work of a critical civilian nature so to speak. So I could offer my expertise you know.  But unfortunately, it was very hard to find the right kind of work and since I had a high draft number, I just was never called up during those times.”

“Did you ever find your critical civilian job, or think about volunteering for the military?” I asked.

“No.” he said tersely, looking up at the huge American flag flying at the steeple-mast. “I spent most of that time working in construction, which you really should consider critical work couldn’t you? I just never thought of it that way until just now.”

I sensed he wished to be off this particular subject. “So, tell me about your boat.” I said to him.

“Well, first of all,” he said rather stuffily, “this here is not a boat. This here is a ship, and a powerful ship of state to be precise. This here ship will be used to bring about critically needed political change to a nation in great peril. Namely ours.”

He went on, “This here ship is very strong. A lot of people don’t know this, but we’ve got a pretty much unlimited budget to make sure the ship is as strong as we want. For example, our powerful engines have been provided to us by wealthy patriots like the Koch brothers and Rupert Murdock who are vitally and unselfishly concerned about this here country. Other money and all our fuel is provided by big oil and energy companies who care about the direction our country is headed and want to dispel any and all ridiculous climate change myths. The hull and many other important parts were donated by Christian patriots who only want to make sure God’s will is followed by the leaders of our country to guarantee abortionists and homosexuals aren’t able to contaminate our society any further.”

“So, where did you get the design for your ship, and who is responsible for that?” I asked, a burning question I had in mind ever since I first saw the thing.

“God provided the design.” he said. “This here ship was built and guided by the hand of God. All the input, every part, every screw and bolt and welded seam was directed by God, every paint brush stroke. In fact, I think this here ship should be considered holy. All we did when we built the ship was put the pieces where it seemed like God wanted them.”

“Which God is that?” I wondered. “Would that be a Jewish god, or Buddhist god, or a combination of a lot of different kinds of gods?”

“Of course not you idiot! I mean the one and only Christian God, Jesus Christ our savior, the Holy Trinity and our country’s salvation!”

I protested at once, “But, our country was founded on freedom of religion or no religion at all. It wasn’t based on any Christian god and neither was the US Constitution.”

The captain instantly swelled up at that and got red in the face. “Well, that’s where you’re absolutely and completely 100% wrong, by God!” he shouted loudly. “Everyone knows this here is a Christian nation, founded by Christians and on solid Christian principles! Maybe they just made a mistake in not pointing that out in the Constitution in the first place, I don’t know. But, that’s one of the things we aim to fix. We’re gonna put Christ back in the schools where he belongs, and put the Ten Commandments in every courthouse in this here country! What are you some kind of heathen atheist communist or traitor or something?”

“No, not at all.” I answered. “Actually I was raised as a Catholic, though probably not a very good one.”

“Well, there you are then. That’s different. Catholics are actually Christians too in their own way I’ve been told.” he said. “Although I don’t know all that much about you Mackerel Smackers myself.”

“Thanks.” I said. “Glad to know I will be allowed to get along in your world once you take over.’ I said somewhat sarcastically. The captain looked at me sharply.

“You ain’t trying to be a smart ass or anything are you?” he snorted.

“Nosirree, not me.” I replied. “So, tell me about the ships’s navigation equipment, the compass and electronics and things like that.”

He smiled as if here he knew to be on solid ground. “Well, we have all the latest there is. All the radars and radios and GPS’s and stuff like that. We didn’t need to spend no money on anything like a compass, now with all the fancy electronics and all, so we didn’t.”

“What if you have a power failure or something?” I asked. “Besides a compass being required by law, power failures do happen on ships fairly often, you know.”

“Law, schmaw. Ridiculous laws ain’t meant to be followed, at least by real Americans. If it’s God will we don’t need no particular law, we don’t pay no attention to it at all. Anyway, God’s hand will guide us if anything happens. Just like he guided Moses in the wilderness, and like he’s guided us so far.” he gave a superior grin. “We have no fear or worries about any of that being Christians. Ain’t you been listening to what I been telling you?”

“Oh, yes, I’ve been hearing you.” I said.

He went on. “Through this here ship we aim to take our country back, and set things right. We’ll fix the excessive taxation, and the runaway budget, and do away with all that social welfare stuff. If folks can’t make it, well, just let them go somewhere else where they believe in and have all that socialism stuff. We ain’t gonna allow that crap here. This country is for God-fearing, hardworking, Christian Americans only. No one else need apply. And that means all those wetbacks too. We’re gonna round ‘em up and send ‘em back where they belong. We’re gonna save America for us Americans!”

“You do know this country was founded almost 100% by immigrants from other countries don’t you?” I asked. “Plus the country was already inhabited by native people who weren’t Christians when our ancestors got here.”

“Well yes, that’s so. But THOSE immigrants were good Christians, and those Indians had to turn over their country to us because they WEREN’T Christians! That was God’s will!” the captain retorted. “Now, it’s our job to keep any more damned dark-skinned heathens out.”

“Most all Mexicans and Central Americans are good and faithful Catholics.” I pointed out.

“Yes, but they are mostly from the brown races which the Europeans brought religion to, just to save their souls from hell and damnation. But they ain’t exactly perfected as Christians yet neither in my opinion. I’ve always suspected that holy Catholic stuff was just a cover for them anyway. Those wetbacks ain’t got no business in our country I tell you, Catholic or not.” the good captain replied.

To change the subject I asked him, “So where is the ship ‘Tea Party Express’ headed from here and what qualifications do you have as captain?” 

The captain replied. “As for my qualifications, why, I’ve got years of experience operating wheat combines on Kansas farms, which ought to qualify me enough to run just about anything you know. As to where we’re headed, why we’re headed to Washington, DC of course. We’re gonna be taking over there or ain’t you heard yet?”

“Well, I’ve certainly heard that’s your goal, but there are at least 70 percent of other Americans who don’t agree with you.” I said.

“Don’t matter.” he said. “We know what’s best for everybody. It may be a little rough for them at first, but they’ll soon see the light and be satisfied once we fix things.”

“What if they aren’t?” I asked. “What if they still disagree?”

“Too bad for them I guess. Like I said, it don’t matter if they do or not. You just can’t go against God’s will.” he replied.

The Unfettered Capitalism Myth

"Merchants have no country. The mere spot they stand on does not constitute so strong an attachment as that from which they draw their gains." -- so said Thomas Jefferson when he advocated against corporations having political power and worked to build a wall between them and our government. Corporations are the single largest form of dominance over people ever devised and have no particular loyalty to any country, including our own.  Profits are the singular guiding standard as Jefferson noted and ever since his time corporations have tried to insinuate themselves into our political system.

They have succeeded beyond their wildest dreams. They are now defined as ‘persons’ and the US Supreme Court recently ruled they can spend as much as they like to elect politicians of their choice. This signals a crystal clear and present danger for our way of life. Now, there seems to be no real obstacle to corporations taking complete control of our government. 

Lot’s of us own stock in corporations, and prosper from their prosperity to various degrees. That’s only one of the many ways used to mollify and soothe the masses. But, it has gone far beyond that.  Corporations invested in and have been stunningly successful in enlisting the very people they are economically enslaving  to their defense and cause. Disparaging ‘capitalism’ in the slightest way exposes you to attack, ridicule and accusation of being communist or treasonous.

“Unrestrained and unfettered capitalism” is the popular war cry. And, war cry it is. The problem is, it is a complete and utter myth. First, it is not capitalism at all. Capitalism as in the popular conception of it went out the window a long time ago. Capitalism as it exists today is actually a 'Corporatocracy', a many-tentacled form of governance by entities nourished and sustained by corporate socialism in the form of huge subsidies and tax breaks from our government. This is orchestrated by the elites who rule the corporations. And, the ones paying the bill are you and I, the taxpaying saps who are now virtual economic slaves.

These elites have access to unlimited funds to influence the legislators who live in their pockets, and have little hope of election without their help. They also have huge treasure chests to propagandize the masses to get them behind their causes.

The Tea Party is a prime example. The spark, and initial money behind this ‘movement’ has been traced back to the Koch brothers, two of the richest men in America and the world. They are aided by a huge media conglomerate (FOX), also owned, not incidentally by one of the richest men in the world. They capitalize on the legitimate fears and frustrations of millions of Americans watching our politicians sell out our country wholesale. Faith in Congress is at an all-time historic low, and with good and sufficient reason. It’s simple really. Congress long ago essentially defaulted on the people’s business, except occasionally under the strongest public pressure. Instead, they block, obfuscate, confuse and dodge any progress or beneficial change objected to by their real clients - the corporations who keep them in office.

And, the damage caused by special interest legislation is legion. One historic example: Corporate money funded legislation legalize a mining method called 'mountaintop removal'  (‘Surface Mining Control and Reclamation Act of 1977,' (515(c)(1)'. Today this vast region is internationally  known as 'APPALACHIA'  with the distinction as the most backward region with the lowest health and literacy rates anywhere in the US. There is more of the same type of thing going on in our country today than most people can ever imagine. The human, or social parts of our society have little value to corporations except for how we can contribute to their profits.

Who are these elites who rule the corporations, and thereby the rest of us? Well, to begin with they are, with few exceptions, the really, really rich. Some of their wealth is inherited, and some was gained through their own efforts, Horatio Alger style. But generally speaking, they comprise the richest one or two percent of people in the nation, and internationally too, as many corporations are wholly or partly foreign owned - yet still have their full say in our political system. And, since they essentially rule our nation, this means we are also being partially ruled by foreigners. Hard to believe, eh?  It is harder still to stomach.

We have been through similar times in our past. The infamous ‘laissez faire’ times of the late nineteenth and early twentieth centuries come to mind. The rich had control back then too. In 1928 almost 24% of the nation’s income came to the hands of the richest 1%. This ratio declined to around 8 or 9% by the 1970’s due to economic reforms, wars and the so-called Great Society. By 2007 we were right back to 1928 levels - almost 24% of total income came once again to the richest 1%. 

It is not coincidental that both periods were followed by the greatest economic crashes in history. Sadly for the rest of us, ironically, in bad economic times the rich tend to get richer, relatively speaking, than any of the rest of us. This bears our the cliché that if you do not learn from history, you are destined to repeat it.  Sadly for our country, all too true.

An election is coming up. We are daily being innundated with political ads demonizing ‘Obamacare’ - the first comprehensive health care plan for all citizens in our entire history. ‘Liberals’ and ‘Progressives’ are roundly pilloried. How anyone can be against progress is beyond my understanding, but there you are. Today is a black is white, white is black world, bought and paid for lock, stock and barrel by Big Corporate Money - ‘BCM’.

Enjoy if you can.

Are Some Tea Partiers Gun Nuts?

Are Gun Nuts Part of the Tea Party Movement?

You can bet your pink pig’s pretty lipstick they are!!!

Gun nuts are out in force at many Tea Party meetings - many openly armed with anything from pistols to assault weapons. No doubt many are carrying concealed weapons too. They are not hesitant about their belligerency and threatening postures.  They are openly claiming to be ‘armed and ready’ for revolution. Many appear to be trying to intimidate all opposition.

This phenomenon seems to be an overboard reaction to their perception and claims that President Barrack Obama is, A): a Muslim; B): A non-citizen, C): a socialist, D): a communist, E): planning to seize all firearms, F): planning to enact legislation making firearms ownership illegal. They are also motivated by extreme, self-feeding paranoia over illegal immigration, abortion, and religion.

‘Liberals’ are routinely denigrated as communists, socialists, ‘libotards’, traitors and so on - without a shred of evidence except in an invented, self-induced paranoia. A prime propaganda source for them is Glen Beck of Fox News. That would be the Glen Beck college drop out, drug addict and alcohol abuser who relentlessly expounds on these themes in his broadcasts.

I can not recall any other group maintaining this level of threat, intimidation and belligerency besides militia crazies and hate/racist groups like the Ku Klux Klan.

All this fear and paranoia is seized upon and fed with incessant propaganda designed deliberately to inflame these people, from sources like the irresponsible Fox News and National Rifle Association (NRA), evangelical church, anti-abortion, militias and anti-immigration groups.

Are they dangerous?  Yes.  You can bet your pig’s lipstick on that too. Any group of armed people motivated by anger, fear and paranoia is intrinsically dangerous by definition. In fact, there have already been incidents of violence and even murder attributed to these paranoids. It doesn’t seem to occur to them in their perception of ‘protecting their rights’ they are heavily infringing on the rights of others.

But, I am also encouraged that leveler heads both inside and outside the Tea Party movement will prevail. I believe most Tea Partiers are probably sincere people, and in their own way as reasonable as can be expected by any group motivated by anger and fear. I also believe the authorities are keeping an eye on the more extreme elements of the Tea Party movement and will act if and when necessary.

Further, I believe Tea Partiers are seriously overestimating their potency in general and in due course will be relegated to the sidelines where they belong by the electorate at large.  I also believe Tea Partiers seriously underestimate the reaction of more moderate people in the event of a showdown.  For one thing, many, if not most ‘moderates’ also own and know how to use firearms.  One other thing: many of us were also well-trained in the use of them during our military tours.

Here are a few 'signs' of Tea Party gun nuts

And, I kid you not!

Are Tea Partiers Racist?

We've always heard the saying, "One picture is worth a thousand words". Sometimes I find that is exactly true.

We have seen and heard the claims that the Tea Party phenomenon includes a lot of racism. I have seen some indications of this but figured, well sure, there are some racists in the movement, just as there are in all political movements.  I did not believe it was rampant, or represents a large constituency in the movement.  

I now believe I was wrong.

I became interested because of the recent NAACP allegations and decided to do a little checking for myself. I always like to check for myself because there seems to be so many hysterical claims from all sides.  I spent about three hours to locate all the 'signs' I needed to change my opinion.  It appears the movement is rampant with racism and several other isms besides.  I will post some information on the other isms in future pages. I am attempting to limit my pages to one topic at a time.

There seem to be many well-meaning, sincere people in the Tea Party movement. But, by their own admission, Tea Partiers are not experienced in political activism, which might tend to make them a bit naive about the propaganda they so obviously and avidly consume. Apparently many have been convinced it's OK to bring their latent racism out of the closet once again. And, any 'political movement' championed, planned, coached and organized by a Fox News commentator who is a school dropout and has a history of alcoholism and drug problems has to be suspect from the outset. You'd think. 

My admittedly non-comprehensive personal investigation convinces me the Tea Party is full of kooks and nut jobs.  And, if you believe their claims they are not racist, I am including several dozen photographs that distinctly and emphatically say otherwise. I have gathered these from many different sources on the web, which you can do for yourself by simply searching for 'Tea Party Racist Images'.

In fact, the sheer numbers I found in such a few short, informal searches makes me fear for our country. It also makes me deeply ashamed of and for some of my countrymen and women.

Are Tea Partiers Racist?  You can bet your pig's pretty pink lipstick they are - and more!

(Click here for pictorial proof that racism is rampant in the Tea Party movement)

How to Start a Marriage Off Wrong

My first wife so earnestly wanted to be sophisticated and citified, and was as a consequence, a determined early woman’s libber.  She had a ‘down home’ first cousin named Bobby Jack.  Ol' Bobby Jack was a lanky and laconic Good Ol’ Country Boy who had a drawl that seemed to drag across two or three time zones. Bobby Jack was married to a buxom country girl named Sharla Sue - a name it seemed to take Ol’ Bobby Jack several seconds to get out. They shared a little wood framed house with a couple kids about ten miles out in the country from town. I will always remember the one and only visit my ex-wife and I made to see them, early in our marriage.

My ex-wife sprang from exactly the same kind of poor dirt farmer country stock as Bobby Jack and Sharla Sue. But, she outgrew her roots so to speak, went off to college, got educated and leveraged herself by sheer force of will into entirely another social strata. I will always credit her with the willpower and determination to do that, no matter our many other differences.

Normally my ex didn’t have much to do with her country cousins, and certainly not on a social level. She always tried to keep them at least an arm’s length away if she could. Nowadays I've observed she’s more laid back and generally more accepting of her family and their roots. Age can do that for you I think. But, back then she wasn’t. On that occasion she kind of let herself get trapped into this particular visit.

Sharla Sue bumped into my wife unexpectedly in town and just insisted that we come out to ‘supper’ that very night - 'dinner' being the noon meal in that part of the world. My wife reluctantly, but graciously agreed and later, dragged me out to their house for dinner, ‘to be polite.’ I didn’t really mind, and besides, I was newly married and curious about her family.

Sharla Sue met us at the screen door, gushing over with welcome and invited us in. She said the kids were playing in the back room. And, Bobby Jack sat there in the living room all kicked back in his Lazy Boy recliner watching television. He didn’t bother to get up, but waved his hand lazily in the air.  “Y’all come on in.” he said neighborly, “Y'all come on in and sit down and make yo'self comfabull.”

He languorously waved over in the general direction of the sofa next to his recliner. I politely shook his hand and sat down. I'd never seen the guy before in my life. My wife and Sharla Sue headed for the kitchen where the dinner was cooking. It smelled great. Fried chicken nearly always does I’ve noticed.

I exchanged a few cautiously polite words with Bobby Jack as I sat on the sofa. Then almost out of nowhere Bobby Jack announced, “I gotta get these God-damned shoes off.” referring to his dirty brogans which were splayed out on the footrest, all covered with mud and God knows what else from the hog pen. I assumed he was excusing himself in order to get up from the recliner and go somewhere to take those nasty things off. They were, after all, exuding a fairly unpleasant odor, competing uneasily with the smell of dinner.

But Ol’ Bobby Jack surprised me by simply rolling to one side on that Lazy Boy recliner, turning his head in the direction of the kitchen and loudly hollering, "Sharla Sue! Sharla Sue! Come in here just a damned minute!"

Those were his exact words. Sharla Sue’s head popped into the doorway almost instantly as she asked sweetly, "What you want Sugarpop?”

Bobby Jack ordered in a sort of peevish, whiny quarrelsome voice: "Pull off my God-damned brogans  and put on my God-damned slippers!"

It was a startlingly definite command or order, delivered with little inflection, yet was most emphatic. The slightly peevish way he said it made it forceful, even through a heavy drawl which seemed to take half a minute to get out.

Bobby Jack then sort of stiffened his body and pushed back a little further in that recliner, sticking his broganned feet out beyond the footrest. His body language and attitude reminded me exactly of a petulant, willful child. I could see my wife watching from the doorway with a offended, glittering look in her eyes. I was quite stunned myself, but also amused by my wife’s reaction, apparently unnoticed by the others. I didn’t say a word.

Without missing a beat and just as cheerful as could be,  Sharla Sue takes hold of his muddy shoe and said, "Here ya go sweetheart." and unties and pulls those smelly, muddy old brogans off and puts on his house slippers. She tossed the brogans on the porch and wiped her hands on her apron.

“That all you need Sweetie Pie?”  She asked as she headed for the kitchen - butter wouldn’t melt in her mouth.

“Mmph.”  Ol’ Bobby Jack acknowledged grudgingly.

Sharla Sue simply smiled sweetly and went on in the kitchen.  My wife turned to follow her in - I could sense she was more than a little indignant and wondered what she might say to Sharla Sue.

They were gone only a moment or two when Bobby Jack asked me, “You lack ('like') that there God-damned tee-vee show?”

“It’s OK,” I said politely.  “It doesn’t make any difference to me.” I was more interested in the family interplay and hardly paying any attention to the television at all.

Bobby Jack leaned back and hollers out again,  "Sharla Sue!  Sharla Sue!  Come back in here just a God-damned minute!"

She came back in from the kitchen and only slightly less sweetly says, "What you want now Sweetie?"

Bobby Jack ordered, "Reach up there and change the channel on that there God-damned tee-vee!”, this being in the days before TV remotes.  He could easily have reached it himself by raising up a little and stretching and leaning forward in the recliner.

But Sharla Sue didn't say a word,  she just smiled sweetly,  reached over and flipped the the channel selector, watching closely until Bobby Jack nodded he was satisfied.  She then returned to the kitchen to finish cooking the fried chicken.

My wife was standing in the doorway once again with her eyes glittering. I could see the rage boiling into her face like a cloud of angry red wasps. I immediately sensed this was a moment not to waste.

I simply could not resist the impulse to say to her, "Honey, I need you to pay really close attention now and take really good notice. You can take notes if you need to. This is the way I  expect you to treat me from now on, by God! Understand?"

And, that right there quite possibly, might be one of the big reasons I’m not married to that woman today. Some people are simply not equipped to share a rollicking sense of humor. Anyway, he was HER damned cousin!

(This little story is entirely true, although I have changed the names to protect the guilty)

Which Country is This?

Let’s suppose you are working clandestinely for your government’s intelligence services. Because of your anti-war activist credentials you are able to make international contacts otherwise unavailable to the government. Your handlers routinely use you for ‘back door’ contacts to unfriendly foreign governments. Let’s suppose you have done this through years of service to your country with good success.

Through your clandestine contacts, you become aware of a direct and imminent threat to your country. Your warnings are ignored and the dire threat becomes all too true, blossoming into a horrific event with international repercussions. After the event, you frantically and repeatedly try to warn your country’s leader against an erroneous course of action leading to war. You even have a close relative who works directly for your leader in his own office, and as a last resort you try to get a warning message to the leader through your relative. Sadly for everyone, that fails.

Now, let’s suppose you watch the leader of your government embark on a course of action which you believe in error. Horrible and bloody wars with all its terrible consequences now result. You are devastated because all your warnings were ignored.

 You try to tell your country what happened. But now, you are a political threat to your government and your leader because of what you know about the ignored warnings. You are arrested by your government’s secret police on  ‘Secret’ spying charges and kept imprisoned without trial for five years.  The courts declare you mentally incompetent and you confined despite psychiatrists' finding that you are not.

After years of imprisonment without trial you are finally released. Even though you try to get it out, the media ignores your story largely because the government has officially branded you as mentally incompetent. In what country do you live? 18th Century France? Cold war Russia?  North Korea?  China?  Iran?  Zimbabwe?

None of the above. Sadly, the answer is “The United States of America”,  and you are a lily-white, natural born American woman, born in the USA, named Susan Lindauer . Your father was a Republican nominee for the governor of Alaska.  The time is 2004-2009. Sadly, most of the media exposure of this tragically unhappy story came through foreign sources.

Read this if you dare. Fair warning: If you are an American, this will give you some very uneasy and chilling feelings about your own country, and most particularly about the so-called ‘Patriot Act’.

In particular, please read Susan’s letter of January 6, 2003 to her cousin Andrew Card, President George W. Bush’s Chief of Staff. That letter is eerily prescient, coming just two months before the Iraq invasion. Even if Susan was mentally challenged this letter should give you pause. Susan’s letter was dismissed by the US Department of Justice as  "an unsuccessful attempt to influence United States policy."

Would that it had . . . oh, would that it had.

Lindauer’s prosecution was quietly dropped 5 days before Barrack Obama’s inauguration as President. Odd, timing isn’t it?  Perhaps the Patriot Act should really be called the 'Patriot Prosecution Act'.

Further reading:  http://www.electionfraudnews.com/News/sl/links.htm