Thursday, January 25, 2007

White House "I Don't Remember" Stratagem

Not satisfied with turning individual civil rights into travesties, the Bush White House in the person of I Lewis 'Scooter' Libby is now mounting a vigorous "I Don't Remember" defense in Libby's court trial. If successful - and it looks as if it well might be given the present make-up of the US Supreme Court - this defense will provide a powerful, perhaps impregnable defense and cover for all White House officials.

This type of defense WILL NOT however, be available for common citizens outside the Bush administration, who still must take their chances under normal, commonly recognized standard laws on the books for hundreds of years.

In many ways the "I don't Remember" defense takes its cues from and is closely related to some of former US Secretary of Defense Donald Rumsfeld's more famous quotes:

"I don't know what I said, but I know what I think, and, well, I assume it's what I said."

"I believe what I said yesterday."

"Needless to say, the President is correct. Whatever it was he said."

" . . .there are known knowns; there are things we know we know. We also know there are known unknowns; that is to say we know there are some things we do not know. But there are also unknown unknowns -- the ones we don't know we don't know."

"I would not say that the future is necessarily less predictable than the past. I think the past was not predictable when it started."

"We do know of certain knowledge that he is either in Afghanistan, or in some other country, or dead." (referring to arch-terrorist Osama Bin Ladin)

"We know where they are. They're in the area around Tikrit and Baghdad and east, west, south and north somewhat."
(On weapons of mass destruction, which in fact were NEVER TO BE FOUND)

This innovative approach to absolving all Bush White House from any and all personal responsibility and accountability holds unlimited possibilities. One can imagine for example, this excuse cascading into something like, "I don't remember if I remembered or not, or if I did remember, I don't remember it."

White House insiders refer to this tactic as the 'DICK' stratagem as in 'Deniable, Indeterminate Confused Knack', named so in honor of VP Richard 'Dick' Cheney's mastery of this arcane art form.

It's best not to try this tactic at home.

Saturday, January 20, 2007



It is nearly done. The transformation of America into a buffoonocracy that is. This little understood transformation has been slowly eroding democracy in our country since Richard Nixon's time. Sure, there have been setbacks and glitches, but overall the transformation has been a great success. Like a slowly rising tide, the campaign has been innundating and inexorable.

First comes the dumbing down. This is usually accomplished by reducing the amount of money available to educate children. Today, America's children arrive in early adulthood dumber than sacks of hammers and in huge numbers. Capable of working, but too stupid for thought.

Cutting educational funding is justified as 'tax cutting' & 'budget cutting' measures. There are also many other hidden ways that education is eroded, such as the pervasive push for the teaching of 'creationism' and other fundamentalist simplifications to turn back the clock to the middle ages and days of serfs serving feudal lords. Simultaneously there is a relentless propaganda campaign against anything progressive or liberal. 'Liberals' are now successfully demonized as a type of person - the 'other' or 'undesirable' sort.

'Fundamentalism' and 'Conservative' becomes the buzz and catchwords of the last two generations. Fundamentalism is defined as 'getting back to the basics' or something hard to change. The myths of religion were enshrined as foundation stones of our Buffoonocracy. In more generic terms 'pigheaded' describes fundamentalism rather well.

A 'Conservative' on the other hand is someone who never wants to try something for the first time. As Franklin Roosevelt famously said, "A conservative is a man with two perfectly good legs, who, however, has never learned to walk forward."

Conservatives have found buffoons to be very easily managed. They can be economically enslaved and seem even happy about it, or at least complacent. Since most never gain the capacity for intelligent thought, they are unable to figure out they are enslaved. As long as you promise a buffoon that he too, has the potential to share in the 'great American dream' and can become rich himself - like his masters - he'll work his ass off for you. Meanwhile, the head of his corporation takes home 400 times the buffoon's annual paycheck - laughing all the way!

A buffoon becomes dangerous when he figures things out for himself, so the goal of conservatives is to keep him dumb and complacent. In the vernacular, 'Fat, Dumb & Happy.' This is accomplished by a relentless campaign from the far right to convince the buffoons their masters are really their heroes, and have only their interests at heart. Meanwhile the buffoons are being used up and discarded like a dirty towels.

Their pension funds are attacked and robbed. They no longer have health care insurance, and all the largesse flows to the elite side of the equation who themselves of course enjoy the fruits of their disenfranchisement of others.

Yes, it is nearly done - the Progress to a New American Century - where the elite will rule without serious opposition, and as they are convinced they are royally entitled.

But the good news is an unhappy buffoon can be lethally dangerous when he finally awakes to what is being done to him. History shows the pendulum ALWAYS then takes a lethal swing.

Just ask the ghosts of French royalty, or Russian aristocracy.

Thursday, January 11, 2007

President Bush Grabs A Bigger Shovel!

Washington, DC 1/11/07: The irreverent Molly Ivins, President Bush's fellow Texan, says "The first rule of holes is: 'When you find yourself in one, quit digging!' " After our president's speech last night, it's now patently obvious that the Bush either never heard of this rule, or just does not subscribe to the notion. But chances are good that since he says he doesn't read, he's simply never heard of this rule.

In his speech to the nation on Iraq, the president said that instead of 'quit digging', he's actually grabbing for a much bigger shovel! It figures. This president has ALWAYS marched to his own drumbeat no matter what. No matter how many experts, or more qualified people on so many subjects advise him on any matter, this president invariably is going to 'do it his way', regardless of the consequences. Some may admire his independence, but when that stubborn streak meets up with his lack of intellect - as on most matters it seems - disaster is a normal result.

Such is the case in Iraq. President Bush insisted on his war there no matter what. No matter what the experts told him, no matter what the facts were, no matter how many people cautioned him to be certain and to be careful, he pushed for his war in Iraq over all objections from anywhere in the world. Colin Powell even told him on Iraq, "Be careful Mr. President. You break it, you fix it."

But, it did not matter. Because of the 9/11 disaster, Bush and his supporters were able to stampede Congress, the media and the frightened public into supporting his war in Iraq. Under false colors of course, and for many deceitfully manufactured reasons, but a war all the same. As we now all know, it has been pretty much all downhill from there. In fact, it has become a quagmire and unmitigated disaster which will follow this country for generations. Bush's insistence on his war, and the subsequent complete mismanagement of the situation has resulted a nightmare which will plague our children and grandchildren and beyond. In other words, he's dug our country a rather large and dangerous hole.

To his credit the president last evening did issue a Mea Culpa of sorts - his first ever - acknowledging his personal responsibility for being wrong on Iraq. But incredibly, he then presented his new plan which could only rightfully be entitled, 'Even More of the Same!'

Our War President is saying: "Just Hand Me That Bigger Shovel!" Even the soldiers in the field guffawed!