Sunday, November 12, 2006
VP Cheney Member of Gay Hunt Club
Casper, Wyoming 11/11/06 (Rioters News Service): It was publicly disclosed today that VP Richard Cheney is a member of a secretive Wyoming gay hunting club. The extraordinary news was disclosed during a court trial for club member charged with male prostitution under Wyoming law.
The accused 'named names' during the trial to show there were many socially elite members in the club. Many well-known and socially prominent names were brought out in open court and first among them was the Vice President's.
Cheney, after first denying the assertion, finally admitted to belonging to the club after the court issued a subpoena for the club's membership list. Cheney later stated, "Well, a lot of my friends belonged to the club and you understand of course I had no idea the club had any gay members - not that it would have mattered." However, it was later disclosed that Cheney was an original charter member of the club who call themselves the 'Long, Hard Rifles'.
"Heck, we always had lots of fun on our outings. And, I never shotgunned a single person either!" said the Vice President with a wry, disarming chuckle in an apparent reference to his earlier shooting of longtime friend Harry Whittington during a Texas Quail hunting outing in February, 2006.
When asked where the club hunted and the types of game they sought however, Cheney seemed at a distinct loss for answers. After trying several times to change the subject but always being pinned down by persistent reporters, Cheney reluctantly admitted the 'hunting trips' were usually held in upscale spas throughout the far west. He grudgingly named several locations reputed to pander to the gay life style.
"Well, we never exactly hunted any actual game, although we certainly would. We were more of a social club you know. But we always insisted on having roast Pronghorn Antelope and Buffalo on the menu and a good wine list." he said with a embarrassed grin. "All our members prefer their creature comforts and like to live large."
Cheney hotly denied that President Bush was a member and said he only came along as a guest 'just a few times'. Bush himself was unavailable for comment and his spokesman claimed no knowledge of any such trips by Bush.
The Vice President's wife refused to comment but their daughter was willing to talk to reporters. She laughed, "Yes, that sounds just like Pops all right: 'Just listen to what I say - facts don't matter!' "