Put Your Money Where Your Mouth Is

Want to do something progressive which is both delicious and effective?  Read on:

Progressives wonder at the obtuseness of some of the worst of the Right Wing idiocy. Like Ann Coulter’s ‘perfection’ of Jews, and Rick Perry’s officially praying for rain, and Michelle Bachmann’s husband’s group for ‘Praying The Gay Away’. And then there’s all the blather about the sins of abortion, the U.S. being a ‘Christian Nation’, and illegal immigration and so on and on and on. If you are a student of history you know the right wing reactionary compulsion is very old, going back to the beginning of recorded time. 

It is a sort of, ‘he or she is not like me, so I’ve got to compel him/her to conform to my way of thinking’.

Right wing conservatives seem to find so many things to be alarmed about. Who knows why they get so exercised and reactionary? My theory is this syndrome is fueled mostly by fear, and its cousin hate, with some envy and jealousy thrown in for good measure - but those are themes for future blogs.

Money seems to be a huge concern for right wingers, and is THE ruling factor in so many of their lives. We progressives need money too of course, but most of us are not so dominated by a primary interest in it. To us money is a means for sustenance and survival and not a tool for control. However, this is not to say money can not be used as a voice.

We all have our favorite causes, and many progressive ideas are just so much anathema to conservatives. So much the better, and therein lies our concept. We often contribute money for our causes, and get a feeling of satisfaction from doing so. But, how about DOUBLING that feeling? 

It is easy really: Just think a little about a cause you may be interested in, and then think of some high profile right winger who is in vocal opposition to it. Once you’ve settled on your right winger, donate to your cause IN THEIR NAME. Make sure you research their name and mailing address so any thank you response from the cause goes directly to your right winger. This can be so, so rewarding and gratifying. Besides directly helping your cause and irritating your target, this lets them know there is someone out there ready and willing to put their money where their mouth is in opposition. Another benefit is your right winger can be seen, albeit indirectly, as actually supporting the cause they vocalize against. 

Sweet!

For example, I myself have donated to the ACLU in Ken Starr’s name, to Planned Parenthood in Sarah Palin’s name, and the Wisconsin Teacher’s Union in Governor Scott Walker’s name. There are so many possibilities you may need to set a budget for your donations to keep things under control.

And, I recommend doing just that by making a list of your right wing ‘donor honorees’ and the causes they are to be honored with. When you sit down to write that check, the feeling is great!

You Might Be a Tea Party Conservative if . . .

You might be a Tea Party conservative if . . .

• You sincerely believe Jesus Christ was white, and likely spoke english;
• You say you are a ‘patriot’ but the only Constitutional amendments you know are the first two;
• You want Freedom of Speech - except for anyone who disagrees with you;
• Fox News is your favorite news channel;
• Fox News is your ONLY news channel;
• You think the government should stay out of states’ rights - unless it concerns marriage, abortion or homosexuality;
• You think abortion of any kind is ‘murder’ but indiscriminate bombing of children is merely ‘collateral damage’;
• You avoided all military duty and believe real patriotism is waving flags and ‘supporting our troops’;
• You believe Jesus Christ would support capital gains tax cuts for the wealthy;
• You think George W. Bush and Ronald Reagan were the best presidents in history, and Sarah Palin would be too;
• You think saying something is so over and over again makes it true;
• You use ‘Jesus’ and ‘guns’ in the same sentence;
• You think Pat Robertson praying for the death of Supreme court justices is a Christian act;
• You think Rush Limbaugh is a perceptive American patriot even though he used drugs, avoided the draft and flunked collage after two semesters;
• You can speak for God in deciding who He likes or doesn’t;
• You think posting the Ten Commandments will solve most school problems;
• You are sure God is on your side, and only your side;
• You are pro life and pro capital punishment all at the same time;
• You insist on the right to bear arms but avoided all military service;
• You think waving a flag and placing a yellow ribbon on your car makes you a patriot;
• You believe Christians should be allowed to indoctrinate school children at taxpayer expense;
• You think global warming is a liberal plot even as you deal with a series of most severe weather events in recorded history;
• You believe greed is a genuine Christian moral imperative;
• You are secretly convinced the Bill of Rights is a liberal idea, and should be repealed for security reasons;
• You think the NRA defends the US Constitution;
• You think it is justifiable for Christians to bomb abortion clinics and kill providers;
• You think Jesus was a right-wing conservative just like you;
• You were completely consumed by Bill Clinton’s sex life;
• You think ‘war is the answer’ to most foreign policy disputes;
• You don’t have a library card, never had one, don’t need one and don’t want one;
• You think prisons should have a higher budget priority than schools;
• You don’t know the actual definition of ‘liberal’ but think it must have something to do with communism;
• Both you and Ann Coulter are still pissed at the way Joe McCarthy was treated;
• You cheer the police when they beat protestors;
• The less you know about something, the stronger your feelings are about it;
• You cheer for soldiers who fight for our country while trying to reduce their benefits;
• You say the Bible proves creationism while evolution is an unproven idea;
• You can’t see the difference between George W. Bush saying he is on a mission from God and Osama Bin Laden saying the same thing;
• You secretly think would be a lot better if women had never gotten the vote; 
• You see no irony in using weapons of mass destruction against another country when you even suspect they might have them;
• You believe that less than a majority vote constitutes a ‘mandate from the people’;
• You think it is patriotic to send the sons and daughters of the poorer people off to fight wars to make rich people richer;
• You use words like ‘professor’, ‘intellectual’, ‘liberal’ and ‘peace lover’ as insults;
• Your attention span stalls after a 6 second sound bite;
• You think bombing a country flat is the best way to ‘bring democracy to their people’.
• You have a Hummer, Lincoln Navigator or Cadillac Escalade with an American flag and yellow ribbon on it;
• You think ‘pre-emptive’ wars can never be used against the U.S.
• You think pre-war Iraq under Hussein was a huge threat to US national security;
• You believe 8 years of peace and prosperity under Clinton was bad for the country and that 8 years of war and economic disaster under Bush was good for us;
• You can’t see any difference between Osama Bin Ladin and Saddam Hussein;
• You believe tax cuts for the rich, outsourcing jobs, corporate tax loopholes and laying people off are sound economic policies;
• You believe government’s concern for people should begin at conception and end at birth;
• You think ‘affirmative action’ is a socialist plot to destroy capitalism;
• You can claim with a straight face that politicians who avoided serving in the military at all costs are courageous patriots;
• You believe corporations are ‘persons’ and should be allowed to make unlimited campaign contributions, but should not be made to pay taxes;
• You believe that Jesus would bomb Afghanistan and Pakistan flat in a New York minute;
• You believe that Muslims, Mexicans, agnostics, non-Christians, democrats, liberals, atheists and most blacks are treasonous and shouldn’t be allowed to vote.
• You did drugs when young but now think first time drug users should be locked away forever;
• You think Sarah Palin has eloquence and style - and you just adore her because ‘she’s just plain folks like me’;
• You can’t make up your mind between home schooling and vouchers;
• You think what ‘religious freedom’ means is actually Christian dominionism.