A Tea Party Jesus

I met a representative of Jesus the other day. That's what he told me.

He didn't seem a lot like the real Jesus, the one who was reportedly nailed to a cross over two millennia ago, then buried in a cave, then, if you believe in the legend, was raised from the dead to become the savior of Christian souls. No, this guy told me he was a retired tire vulcanizer from Cincinnati, Ohio. He carried a flag with a cross on it which had the words * 'Time to Reload' written on it. I found him at a Tea Party rally wearing a pair of camouflage pants and a baseball cap with the words, “NRA” boldly emblazoned in gold on the front.

I approached him for an interview. This guy was white, had a fair sized pot belly and was seriously going bald, both of which he tried to hide. He unsuccessfully tried to suck in his gut when I approached and his baldness wasn't evident until his flag accidentally brushed his cap off his head. He assured me he was 'standing up for Jesus' and was doing Jesus' work on Earth. He said was one of the faithful working to save our nation. I believed him.

“And, I'm taking my country back!” he informed me defiantly.

“From where and whom?” I wondered, puzzled.

“From the communists, and illegal immigrants and queers and liberals of course!” he said. “Them and their puppet Obama have just about destroyed the country. Just look at how deep in debt they have us now!”

“They have?” I asked.

“Damned right! And now, they're gonna raise taxes on everybody!” he replied.

“They are?” I asked. “I thought they were going to just let the tax cut for the rich expire. And, I thought the economy went sour while Bush was still in charge.”

“They are going to raise taxes on everybody making over $250,000 a year!” He spurted. “And everybody knows the Democrats ran the economy in the ditch the last year of Bush's term!”

“So, how will this affect you?” I asked. “Will your taxes go up because you make over $250,000 a year?”

“It's not me I'm talking about!” he protested. “If you tax the rich, then they won't have money to invest! That's the core principle of trickle down economics. Rush Limbaugh is always talking about that.”

“Well, it's not actually a tax increase.” I explained. “It's just letting Bush's tax cut expire. The tax rate will simply go back to where it was under Clinton – when we didn't have anything trickling down and things were booming right along nicely. We also had a big budget surplus back then too, or didn't you notice?”

“Nope. I was too busy making a living, and waiting for the shoe to drop.” he said.

“What shoe?” I asked.

“The economic shoe, dummy! What just happened!”

“But the economy went south two years ago under George W. Bush.” I pointed out mildly.

He snorted, “Are you nuts? It was Clinton's policies and the liberal Democrats in Congress who ambushed Bush and deliberately trashed the economy just to make him look bad. Rush Limbaugh has explained it on his radio show many, many times. Everybody knows that . . ”

“They do?”

“Hell yeah! Where you been, sleeping under a rock or something?” he retorted. “You must be part of that drive by media Rush is always talking about.”

There was no real answer to that so I just let it go.

“So, you think Jesus wants you to take our country back with guns?” I asked to change the subject.

“Damned right!” he retorted. “Just like we took it back from the British in the first place! It's about time to water the tree of liberty with blood, and * it's time to get liberals in the cross hairs!”

I said, “That doesn't sound much like the Jesus I learned about in Sunday School. That Jesus was supposed to be a man of peace and always tried to promote peace the way I remember it.”

He snorted, “Yeah, well if Jesus was on Earth today, he'd be out here with me. He doesn't intend for us to put us with communists and socialists or queers which are an abomination to his name. Jesus would have his guns loaded and locked, ready to defend our country against them like all patriots. I know that for a fact!”

“You do? I asked. “How?”

“Yep! All good Christians know that.”

“I take it you consider yourself a good Christian then.” I said. “Which church do you go to?”

“I'm a Jehovah's Witness.” he answered. “We're perfected Christians and my pastor says Jesus is real upset the way things are going and it's past time for Christians to set things straight. That's why I'm here today. If we can't straighten things out by electing the right people, we might need to take direct action.”

I asked, “Do you mean take up arms?”

“Hell, yeah!” he responded. “A lot of us Christians are locked and loaded and ready to go.”

“You do know armed insurrection against the government is illegal don't you?” I asked. “That if you take up guns to in defiance of law you could go to jail?”

“We don't pay attention to any laws that ain't the law of God.' he retorted. “God and Jesus guide us every step of the way, and I'm here to bear witness to that!”

I though it impolitic and would not serve any real purpose to point out that was exactly the way the Taliban justifies their terrorism. The only difference being nomenclature – Allah instead of Jesus.

I came away from the interview thinking if things keep going along the same way, this guy would probably need to enter the Jehovah Witness Protection Program someday.

* actual quotes by Sarah Palin

A Lightning Bolt From Jesus

"And now verily, Thou art mine own annointed one!"

An Alaska blogger named 'HistoryBuff' believes Sarah Palin took her selection as John McCain's running mate as a 'Lightning Bolt From Jesus', and her unrestricted license for unilaterally beginning her own campaign for national office, specifically, the presidency of the United States of America!

And lot's of Palin's actions since then seem to bear this theory out, since they make little sense otherwise. After her 'lightning bolt' selection, everything has been 'always about Sarah', hang anything else including the State of Alaska. Naturally, this gives considerable discontent to Alaska's citizens, where her approval ratings have plummeted from over 90% to the 50's and 60's - but still well over her predecessor's dismal 19% when he left office:

• She said she would refuse the stimulus money - then said she would only refuse 43% of it. Sort of like cheering for funding for the Bridge to Nowhere, then coming out against that boondoggle;

• She took a free ride on the GOP for $150,000 for clothing, plus another $55,000 in hair and personal stylist costs, plus $23,000 in 'accessories;

• After Palin's selection, she quickly morphed into the rogue of the McCain campaign, becoming in the process a Maverick's Maverick (A re-Maverick?);

• She shamelessly used her children as campaign props many times;

• She even horned in uninvited, on her own daughter's TV interview with Fox;

• She's most recently been in the news complaining she couldn't find anyone in the McCain campaign to pray with;

And now, it seems that Jesus' Lightning Bolt could well fissile . . .

Apparently for the publicity, Palin took it upon herself to endorse Texas Republican Governor Rick Perry over another well-known Republican Kay Bailey Hutchison. Perry, who was George W. Bush's Lt. Governor and his successor as governor of Texas, is one of those five Republican governors who, like Sarah 'refused' the Stimulus Package. That's in spite of the fact Texas has the highest child homelessness rates in the nation, lowest expenditure per pupil for Texas childrens' education and many other notable economic deficiencies. But then everyone by now should know the new Republican maxim: "Doctrine over reality".

Palin's endorsement prompted a Texarkana Gazette editorial to declare, "When it comes down to it, Palin doesn’t know Eskimo from Alamo about Texas government and politics.";

Palin still takes flak for her exorbitant use of GOP money for clothing and accessories - roughly a quarter mil or so. One pundit has declared - based on Palin's nearly legendary ignorance on anything outside Alaska - that she most likely simply believes NAFTA stands for, "Need Another Fifty Thousand For Accessories";

Palin repeatedly tries her versions of strong arm politics against her opponents, most of whom are better at the game, and which usually leaves her with egg all over her face. One problem is Sarah keeps trying unfamiliar language to appear knowledgeable and intelligent - and coming up otherwise. Sort of a George W. Bush in lipstick in fact. For example, here's what she told interviewed matt Lauer after the election results were in: "we tried to articulate that we were the true change agent that would progress this nation."

You betcha!

But, Sarah is nothing if not consistently 'radically conservative'. For example, she recently chose as Alaska's new Attorney General, one Wayne A. Ross who happens to be a director for the National Rifle Association, and has been knighted by the Vatican for his anti-abortion work. Ross's red HUMMER carries a personalized license tag reading "WAR". (Ostensibly for 'Wayne Anthony Ross'?)

Honestly, you can't make this kind of stuff up!

Palin's extreme radicalism can only be good for progressives everywhere!

Keep it up, Sarah!

You betcha!

Christianity - The Biggest Scam and Ponzi Scheme of All Time

So you think Bernard Madoff's 60 Billion Dollar scam was an all-time record? Think again. The biggest scam in history is Christianity, which has been going on now for over 2000 years and shows no sign of faltering. The amounts of money, treasure, lives and destruction involved are staggeringly uncountable.

Christians are commanded to believe in their God, and Jesus Christ, the 'Son of God', from whom the name 'Christian' is coined. They are told in the Bible to believe by faith alone since, "Faith is the assurance of things hoped for, the conviction of things not seen." (Hebrews 11:1)

In other words, it doesn't matter there's no proof, 'just believe because we say it is so'.

They are told that the all the proof needed is in the Christian Bible, which is composed of two parts - the 'Old' and the 'New' Testaments - as interpreted by their all-too-human Christian leaders:

Jesus, the 'Son of God' referred to the Old Testament as the "Word of God" which "cannot be broken" (John 10:35).

He said, "until heaven and earth disappear, not the smallest letter, not the least stroke of a pen, will by any means disappear from the Law until everything is accomplished" (Matt. 5:18).

Paul added, "All Scripture is God-breathed" (2 Tim. 3:16).

It came "out of the mouth of God" (Matt. 4:4).

Although human authors recorded the messages, "prophecy never had its origin in the will of man, but men spoke from God as they were carried along by the Holy Spirit" (2 Peter 1:20-21).

Christians are commanded to believe in the Bible without question, because everything contained therein is the 'True Word of God' under this so-called logic:

God cannot err.
The Bible is the Word of God.
Therefore, the Bible cannot err.
God Cannot Err!

And, when questioned about possible inconsistencies or errors in the Bible - no matter how many or how ridiculous - Christians invariably reply the Burden of Proof (of the error) is on the critic - not the Bible! It's sort of the 'Mother of all Catch-22's'!

This is mirrored in a Christian (I suppose) bumper sticker I once saw:

God Said It; I Believe It; That Settles It!

Is there any wonder the current Christian leader of our country George W. Bush appreciates and uses this approach?

Evangelical Christians - and ALL Christians are commanded by Jesus in the Bible to be evangelical, though not all are in fact - relentlessly seek to * export their 'faith' to others around the world. They spend billions of dollars to 'convert the wicked and Godless', with their de facto definition of 'Godless' being 'non-Christian'. They piously claim to be fulfilling the 'Spiritual Needs of native peoples' by bringing them the 'Word of God' and 'salvation'. In the process they destroyed the lives and cultures of millions of people around the world over the centuries, while robbing them of treasure and sustenance. They have have been responsible for millions of deaths through their forcible 'conversion' and 'perfection' of non-Christians. Like some Islamics, they seem none too concerned if millions of innocent 'heretics' and non-believers must die in the process.

Over a period of about 300 years from 1484 to 1782, Christian churches put to death over 300,000 women accused of witchcraft in Europe and America. Incredibly, Christians later insisted with straight faces, the witch hunts were a 'result of theological misapplication and the people involved were penitent'.

You see, if you are a Christian, you can be forgiven for anything - except disbelief!

We have all heard of the 'Inquisitions' (of which there are four recognized), where heretics and apostates were punished and put to death - often by burning at the stake - for 'heresy' and 'apostasy' , which were defined as questioning, or opposition to the doctrine of the Roman Catholic or Orthodox Christian Churches. Many non-Catholic Christians ('protestants') were victims. Any protestant falling into the hands of authorities in Catholic countries - through shipwreck or otherwise for example, was subject to be tried and punished for heresy or apostasy.

Galileo Galilei - the great astronomer, mathematician and philosopher of the 16th and 17th centuries was tried and convicted of heresy by the Roman Catholic church. His sin was proving the Earth orbited the sun. This ran contrary to church doctrine, which placed Earth at the center of the universe. Galileo's inconvenient fact is also inconsistent with the literal meaning of scripture - and incidentally unreconciled even today, with the excuse that it's all in how scripture is interpreted! Galileo was forced to 'recant' and spent the last years of his life under house arrest.

Incredibly, there are still some Catholics today who muleheadedly insist the church was right and Galileo was wrong, even though they admit the heliocentric ('Copernician Theory') was correct as far as it went. They maintain Galilieo brought all his troubles on himself by being so public with his opinions and proof. In other words they want things both ways in the Christian tradition of never admitting error in the smallest degree. Ever. I assume that must be what a 'perfected' Christian is all about, a la Ann Coulter.

And then there were 'The Crusades' - seven in all, which took hundreds of thousands if not millions of lives. Pope 'Innocent III' (what an ironic name!) avowed salvation could be bought simply by going on a Crusade - to 'convert' apostates at the point of a sword! There was even a (disputed) 'Children's Crusade' of up to 30,000 children and/or poor people who marched towards Jerusalem to 'peaceably convert' the Muslims there. When the Mediterranean Sea did not part as planned, many were sold into slavery or otherwise died. According to contemporary accounts, none returned home.

One overriding theme is evident throughout 'Christianity' to this day, and that is the wealth of the church and its leaders, at the expense of their followers. This is the biggest scam of all time, and still in full flower, with millions of 'victims' willing and eager to contribute, up to everything they own.

Take Pat Robertson for one well-known example. There are thousands of others, with perhaps the greatest offender of all being the Holy Roman Catholic Church.


* "(19) Go to the people of all nations and make them my disciples. Baptize them in the name of the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit, (20) and teach them to do everything I have told you. I will be with you always, even until the end of the world." Matthew 28:19-20